1995 Volvo 960 GLE review from UK and Ireland

The outside temperature is now always -188c.

Cruise control hardly ever works.

Fuel gauge only works on last few litres of fuel in tank.

Drivers seat won't go very far forward, so you need to be 5ft 10ins or more to reach the pedals.

Drivers seat belt plastic fixing is held together with an elastic band - due to some neanderthal grease monkey "fixing" the seat belt warning light some years ago.

Scuff mark on front n/s bumper, where a lamp post jumped into my path and hit the car about six years ago.

Lumbar supports packed in years ago.

Air conditioning failed (again) about 5 years ago, and I haven't bothered to have it repaired.

At low speed there are a lot of clunky noises from under the car, like something is about to fall off or disintegrate. This is easily overcome by rapid acceleration, which drowns out aforementioned noises until a speed of between 50 and 135 m.p.h is achieved - *** note it is probably wise to be in at least 2nd gear at 50 mph, and seriously considering changing up to 5th gear at 135 mph.

After having this car for nearly ten years, I have got to say that it owes me nothing.

I have been towing a Lynton 2.5 metre Load Runner (weighs 580kg empty) for most of this time, and my biggest gripe is when I have to emergency brake when the trailer has a 1000kg load on it.

The sequence of events goes like this: You are motoring along with a full load behind you, the car in front slams on its brakes for whatever reason. YOU HIT THE BRAKE PEDAL. The car starts to slow down rapidly, so rapidly that the trailer's brakes engage. This is relayed to the ABS system, which immediately lets go of the car's brakes, even though your foot is pressed down hard on the brake pedal. The cars brakes cut in again and the car starts to slow down again rapidly, so rapidly that the trailer's brakes engage... etc.,etc. It seems to take forever before you stop, all the while being subject to this violent jerking 2 or 3 times a second, but I am told that this is no different to doing an emergency stop in an articulated lorry.

I have yet to see a car thief nick one of these, they seem to prefer Astras and Escorts.

My car is just about to clock 150,000 miles, and I have decided to buy a V70 2.5 SE T, as I run my own business, and being seen in an old "M" reg. is not good for my image.

I shall be sorry to see her go, but hopefully we will pass each other on the streets around Leicester, as I do with my previous 740GLE, which belongs to a local taxi firm, and is still going strong (we parted when it had 136,000 on the clock in 1998, so I wouldn't like to begin to guess what mileage that has done now).