I bought this car as a stop-gap to get me to work for a few months until my insurance money came through (my previous pride and joy, a Mazda MX-3, was killed by a mad driver).
I foolishly thought I'd be buying a cheap, nippy, fun little car.
How wrong I was.
My girlfriend says I'm being a snob, but I swear to you the build quality on this vehicle is absolutely appalling.
Ignore the Max Power crowd - despite the on-paper figures this is no sports car. The components just can't keep up with the car's 130BHP.
The gearbox feels horrifically cheap and I get the feeling it could break at any minute. Rapid gear changes after tight bends make a nasty crunching sound as though the clutch hasn't disengaged.
The brakes are extremely vague even when the pads are replaced - not what you want from a car of this performance.
A quick thrash round some country lanes leaves the cabin smelling faintly of cooking; I have the suspicion this is the feeble clutch being deep-fried.
The suspension is virtually non-existent. Every tiny stone and dried blade of grass is translated into a spine grinding jolt. This appears to be Citroen's ham-fisted attempt at making a school-and-shopping car 'handle'. Which it doesn't, especially in the wet; this car enjoys skittering and sliding about with its wheels spinning in mid-air.
The footwell is so tiny I have to drive around sitting at a slight angle; the pedals are so close together I tread on my own feet.
The engine note is vile. Compared to the lovely smooth tone of my previous car this sounds like Brian Blessed yelling at you from the bottom of a well.
Despite claims of 7.4 second 0-60 times, and dubious accounts from young boys who claim to have done 199MPH in one of these, I can assure you that the numbers are purely academic. Over 90MPH this car feels positively terrifying; not only is the wind-noise deafening, the steering gets all floaty and the brakes would never save if you had to stop within less than about ten miles.
All your worst suspicions about this car are true; it really is as bad as you think it is, and even worse than the people on this site say it is.
I've put up with the torment for a month and my insurance money's come through.
With any luck I should be back in something japanese by the weekend, and this particularly mouldy slice of french cheese will be a distant memory...